The Trumpton Riots Songtext - Half Man Half Biscuit

The Trumpton Riots - Half Man Half Biscuit

Ner ner-ner-ner ner-ner-ner ner
Ner ner-ner-ner-ner-ner

No! Oh oh oh!
Elevate!

Unemployment's rising
In the Chigley end of town.
And it's spreading like pneumonia;
Doesn't look like going down.
There's trouble at the fire station;
Someone's had the sack.
And the lads are going to launch a scheme
To get rid of Captain Flack

Tell PC McGarry
To get himself a mate.
And arm themselves with C.S.Gas
They're gonna be out late.
We've had Cant conformism since 1966.
And now subversions in the air
In the shape of flying bricks!

Chorus:
Someone get a message through
To Captain Snort
That they better start assembling
The boys from the fort.
And keep Mrs. Honeyman right out of sight,
'Cause there's gonna be riot
Down in Trumpton Tonight.

All this aristocracy
Has really got to stop.
We can overthrow the surgery
And kidnap Doctor Mop
And Chippy Minton’s Socialists
Could storm the market square
And make plans to assassinate
Our autocratic mayor!

Windy Militant leads
His Basque-like corn grinders to war
With windmill sails and bombs with nails
They smash the town hall door.
But Snorty and the boys arrive
With one big erstwhile crew
Whereupon they bring about
A military coup.

Chorus x 2


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